Shudder (Stitch Trilogy, Book 2) Read online

  Unfortunately, though, seeing Isaac with his could-be family had only added yet another weight onto Alessa’s shoulders. She knew she needed to get Isaac and Janie away from the rebellion to protect them, and she knew that Isaac would never agree, so she had planned to trick him into leaving. He would be furious, but at least he would be alive.

  But she hadn’t factored in the chance that he might reunite with this family. Abandoning the resistance was one thing; abandoning the closest thing he had to family, that was another. Alessa wasn’t sure if Isaac would ever forgive her for taking him away from them. But then again, at least he’d be alive to hold that grudge. If she let him stay… there was no telling how things might turn out.

  Alessa had spent most of the day trying to distract herself from the guilt by focusing every ounce of her concentration on praying that her sister would – as Regina suspected – be somewhere in the solitary wing of the prison. If she couldn’t find Janie, she didn’t know what she would do. She certainly couldn’t leave her behind, not again, not without knowing if she was even safe.

  The irony of her feelings was not lost on her, either. Alessa knew what she was about to do to Isaac was exactly what she refused to do to herself, to ask him to leave the people he cared about most to save his own skin. Alessa would never agree to do that to Janie, and Isaac, she knew, would never willingly do it to Jo and her parents. That was why she wouldn’t give him a choice, wouldn’t even let him suspect until it was too late.

  She felt like such a hypocrite. But better to sacrifice her own honor than Isaac’s life, right?

  Alessa crawled into her stiff cot to rest while she waited for Isaac to return. He’d gone to stop by Martha and Albert’s room one last time, to make sure that they were prepared for tomorrow’s escape.

  The logistics of covertly moving 800 people to an off-limits part of the city were, as one might imagine, a tad bit complicated. If a single person was caught in the area by Paragon’s guards, it could raise suspicions and foil the entire plan. Isaac was determined to make sure that Jo’s family at least would be able to get to the rendezvous point safely.

  It helped that the depot itself was underground in an abandoned section of the compound, and could be reached through the sewer system. But that still meant that 800 people had to climb out of bed, sneak out of their efficiency units, clamber through a manhole or drainage grate, and make their way in the dark to an area they’ve never been to before, all without making a sound. There were bound to be some mishaps.

  But then again, knowing Regina, that was probably part of the plan. The ones who got caught would provide a diversion for the rest of them. Regina was as ruthless as she was pragmatic – Alessa couldn’t see her arguing against a small sacrifice for the good of the whole. But Alessa herself didn’t feel quite so good about that philosophy – it just didn’t seem fair. She was glad she wasn’t the one in charge, that she didn’t have to be responsible for making these decisions.

  The door creaked open and Isaac slid into the room, a grin plastered across his face. “That Josephine,” he shook his head, still smiling to himself, “is really something else. I don’t know how a kid who grew up like she did could just be so buoyant.”

  Alessa smiled in return, though inside her heart was crushed by a python of guilt. “She’s remarkable, Isaac. I can see why you care about her the way you do.”

  He crossed the room and lay down on the cot beside Alessa, spooning her. “She keeps going on about her ‘great adventure’ tomorrow, like it’s a vacation or something. She’s not even scared. It’s amazing.”

  Isaac draped his arm around Alessa’s waist and she squeezed his hand with her own. She was glad she couldn’t see his face – she didn’t want to imagine the disappointment in his features once he realized her betrayal.

  “So, how are you doing?” Isaac asked. He leaned over her and she shifted onto her back so they could talk more easily. Isaac slid an arm under Alessa’s neck, cradling her head, and laid his other hand gently across her stomach.

  She liked feeling wrapped up in him like this – she hoped tonight wouldn’t be the last time he wished to be this close to her.

  “Are you ready for tomorrow?” he prompted.

  Alessa shrugged. “I think so – it’s just a raid, right? We’ve been trained for this. I’m nervous about finding Janie – if I’ll find her at all, what I’ll find if I do – but I guess there’s nothing I can do about that now. I’ll just have to go and see what I come up with. Are you ready for the hospital?”

  They didn’t really know the med center as well as the prisons, and as far as Alessa knew, didn’t have any allies on the inside there. As a result, Alessa was a little worried about Isaac’s assignment to search for rebels in the medical ward.

  Isaac looked away quickly before responding. “Yeah, I’ll be fine. I’ll be careful, don’t worry.”

  Some intuition prickled at Alessa, but she dismissed it. She was probably just worried. At least they both had teams going in with them – that would allow them to cover more ground and get out of there more quickly.

  “And what about your empath stuff?” Isaac asked. “Do you feel like you understand it better now?”

  Alessa nodded. “What Michael said made sense. I can feel those primal pre-death emotions that everyone experiences, whether they’re left behind on a place or being carried within a person – or, a thing.” She shook off a memory of the bone-chilling howl produced by those creatures.

  “All the puzzle pieces finally fit,” Isaac agreed. He grinned. “Though I’d like to point out that my theory was about 80% of the way there…” He sighed exaggeratedly. “If I’d ever heard of this ‘empath’ stuff before, I totally would have gotten it.”

  Alessa smiled and tapped the tip of his nose with her fingertip. “I’d expect nothing less, Isaac Mason.”

  He smiled down at her and planted a soft kiss on her lips, a few locks of his thick brown hair brushing against her forehead.

  When he pulled back from the kiss, something flashed in Isaac’s eyes. Alessa couldn’t ignore it this time – he was hiding something.

  “What is it?” Alessa questioned.

  “What?” Isaac feigned. He looked away, his eyeballs suddenly glued to their entwined fingers.

  “You’re not telling me something.”

  Isaac pressed his lips together and refused to meet her gaze.

  He definitely wasn’t telling her something.

  Finally, he let out a ragged sigh. “I’m not supposed to say anything,” he mumbled.

  Alessa waited. Then gently, “Say anything about what?”

  Isaac swallowed and ceased toying with her fingertips. Finally, he relinquished her hand and lifted his eyes to hers. “I’m not just going after prisoners in the med center tomorrow. Regina needs me to retrieve something.” He looked away for a second, then back. “The fuel cell for the train we’re taking out of Paragon.”

  “What?” Alessa blurted. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

  “No one knows – no one except Regina, and Sato and Carlos, who are retrofitting the train. She’s afraid word will get to the wrong person, that Paragon will find out about our plans again. She didn’t want to chance it.” He grimaced apologetically.

  “Regina doesn’t trust me to keep this secret?” Alessa bleated, outraged.

  “No, no, Less – it’s not like that. She just didn’t want to risk anything…”

  Alessa shook her head, fuming. How could Regina ask Isaac to keep something like this from her? Didn’t she realize how insulting that was to both of them? How unreasonable it was to wedge herself into their relationship like this?

  Regina truly held nothing sacred.

  Alessa could spit – she should have seen this coming the minute Regina asked to speak to Isaac alone.

  Isaac reached for her hand, grasped it tightly. “I’m sorry, Less. I never should have kept this from you.” He brought her fingers to his lips and kissed them gently.

  Ale
ssa exhaled a weary groan. It wasn’t Isaac’s fault – he was just following orders. It was Regina’s fault, for giving the order in the first place.

  She sighed. “It’s okay, Isaac. Thank you for telling me.” Alessa was resigned – there wasn’t much she could do. Isaac would fulfill this one last mission, and then she’d find a way to get him out. “Please –” she pleaded, “– just be careful, all right? We’re almost done with Paragon.”

  His lips, still pressed to her fingers, curled into a smile. “Almost done,” he agreed.

  They sat there like that for a moment, regarding each other. Isaac’s sapphire eyes seemed to glow as he took in Alessa’s face.

  “My strong, smart, beautiful green-eyed girl. No matter what happens tomorrow, or the day after, or whenever,” he whispered, “this is how I want to remember us. This is perfect, right here.”

  Alessa blinked back tears and smiled up at him. If she could push Regina aside, this moment would be just right. “You almost wouldn’t know the world had fallen down around us.”

  “No, you wouldn’t.” A flash of darkness crossed Isaac’s eyes. “I still can’t quite believe it… one viral outbreak and –” he snapped his fingers, “– poof. Everything we knew is gone.”

  “I wonder if we’ll ever know how it started, truly,” Alessa mused.

  “At this point,” Isaac nuzzled his face into her neck with a sigh, “I’m more interested in how it ends. Everything’s going to change tomorrow, huh?”

  Alessa was worried about that, too. Yes, everything was about to change tomorrow – but not the way Isaac thought.

  “That reminds me.” He eased his arm out from under Alessa and sat up, digging through his pocket for something.

  Alessa sat up, wondering what he could be searching for.

  Finally, Isaac smiled brightly and withdrew his hand. In between his thumb and forefinger, he held up a ring.

  “I got this for you, back at the mall.” He looked sheepish. “But then I forgot about it when I got sick. I just found it in the bottom of my bag this morning.”

  Alessa pulled his hand to her and examined the ring. “Isaac… it’s gorgeous.” It was a shiny sterling silver band, set with two round stones on either side – one a deep, sparkling cobalt, the other a fiery emerald.

  “Blue and green,” Isaac explained. “For our eyes.”

  “It’s perfect.” Alessa slipped the ring on and kissed Isaac deeply.

  He took Alessa’s hand and ran his thumb over the ring. He seemed to be chewing something over in his mind. Finally, he looked up at Alessa, her fingers still knotted in his.

  “Listen, I want you to know that this ring means something. I – I know you know I love you. But it’s more than that, too.” With his free hand, he swept the hair from Alessa’s eyes and tucked it behind her ear, gently cupping the side of her face.

  “I know sometimes it feels like the world has ended – and, I guess, in a lot of ways for us, it has. But I want this ring to always remind you that it’s not over. I thought my world was over once, Alessa, until I found you. You drew me back from that ledge, you gave me a reason to go on – and then at some point I finally realized that we were actually just at the beginning.”

  He leaned in and brushed his lips over hers, just barely touching, and looked up into her eyes. All Alessa could see was blue – sapphire and cerulean, ocean and sky – and she never wanted to turn away.

  “I’ll never stop making a new world for you, Less, no matter how bad it gets,” Isaac whispered. “It will never be over for us. Remember that, okay?”

  Alessa nodded, the words caught in her throat, and Isaac pulled her gently forward, their lips meeting in a flurry of fireworks and dizziness and passion.

  This was her Isaac, the person she loved more than anything, needed more than anyone – and tomorrow she would betray him. She buried the thought and channeled her anxiety into her kiss instead, lost herself in Isaac’s body one last time before everything would be different.

  After they had taken comfort in one another, Isaac lay dozing peacefully, but Alessa tossed and turned under the blankets.

  She didn’t want to hurt Isaac. But she didn’t know how else to keep him safe. Hopefully he would remember what he’d said – that it would never be over for them, no matter how bad it seemed. They’d start fresh, carve out a new existence, somewhere far away from Paragon and the rebellion. He would forgive her, eventually…

  She fingered the ring he’d given her, the two stones – green and blue – separated by a stiff bar of smooth, cold metal. She wondered if that was symbolic somehow – if there would always be something pushing them apart. The rebellion, his imminent anger over taking him from his family… Joe. It seemed like lately there’d been a lot coming between them. Maybe from now on there always would be.

  Alessa sighed and closed her eyes. The ring – and everything it might represent – would be there tomorrow. Tonight, she needed her rest.

  31. REVEAL

  Thump. Isaac cursed silently under his breath. He kept forgetting how narrow these ventilation shafts were.

  Shimmying through the ceiling of the medical center, he’d caught glimpses of a few quiet rooms, all empty and dark. From what Isaac could tell, the hospital seemed pretty dead at this hour – as heavy and still as the blackness that still reigned outside, awaiting dawn to creep its way into the sky. Any noise he made was sure to be heard, if there was anyone there to hear it. He would need to be more careful to keep quiet.

  1, 2, 3, 4… He lay low on his belly, counting the beats from the rhythmic throbbing in his chest, his ears straining for any signs of life outside the crowded chute. All that stirred was the whish of a fan at the far end of the shaft.

  Relieved, Isaac slithered deeper into the building, looking for an opening into a closet or bathroom somewhere near the central stairway that would lead to the power room in the basement. He just needed to get down there, grab the battery, and get out. He hoped that task would be as simple as it sounded, but he knew from experience that nothing in Paragon ever was.

  The tiny comm device in his ear crackled, and he surreptitiously ran a finger over it to make sure it was secure. He’d left his team outdoors, waiting beside the vent he’d entered through – they were ready to extract him if anything went awry.

  Scooting round a corner, a sudden thud on Isaac’s right stopped him in his tracks. He didn’t think he’d made the noise – where was it coming from?

  Thud, thud, thud. The sound seemed to be issuing from below him, somewhere up ahead. A tinny voice floated through the shaft, the panic in the notes making Isaac’s hairs stand on end. “Let me out of here!” it cried. Thud, thud, thud.

  There was a grate ahead on the right, maybe ten feet further down the chute. Painstakingly, Isaac slid his way forward, careful not to make a single sound.

  As he reached the vent, Isaac peered through the narrow slits to take in the brightly lit room below. It was a small, typical-looking hospital room, with a bed, a chair, a wide window, and various medical machines.

  A disheveled patient was standing at the door, banging on the glass with the flat of a skinny wrist, a few strands of wavy blonde hair sticking out of the swaths of gauze that circled her head and face. Long, goose-prickled calves sprouted from the bottom of her hospital gown, her thin, bare feet splatting against the linoleum with every step. The girl looked thin, and frail, but determined.

  Thud, thud, thud. “I can see you out there! I want to speak to the Developer,” she demanded. “Tell him I remember. Ev-er-y-thing.” She spelled out the syllables of the last word with venom and stared fiercely through the window at whoever was on the other side.

  Finally, she groaned in frustration and turned around, stalking quickly to the gleaming white chair on the opposite side of the room. She lifted it over her head and looked pointedly back toward the door, then turned her body toward the window and chucked the chair with all her might.

  The chair bounced off the thick glass, bu
t the thin plastic blinds bent under its weight, one end of the unit detaching from the wall, the individual strands sticking out in all directions like reeds in a sterile white marsh.

  She retrieved the chair from the floor and raised it up once again, turning towards the door with malice shining in her eyes. Those eyes were the only part of her face that Isaac could see through the bandages, and they looked serious. She angled her body toward the medical equipment, the chair still dangling threateningly above her head. “Your stupid machines are next!” she shouted.

  That seemed to get the attention of whoever she was speaking to. A moment later a sigh of relief crossed her lips and she put the chair down and collapsed onto the bed, curling into a tight ball. Isaac guessed she wasn’t feeling as strong as she wanted them to believe.

  Intrigued, he waited beside the vent, afraid his movements might draw her notice. The seconds ticked by interminably, and an eternity passed before something occurred to Isaac – somehow, the woman seemed familiar to him. Was it possible she was one of the rebels?

  A sudden whoosh sounded and the door to the room slid open. The patient sat up quickly in bed as a gawky, greasy-haired young man slunk into the room, rubbing beady, sleep-rimmed eyes under his thick glasses.

  “Phoenix,” he yawned. “I wasn’t expecting the pleasure of your company at this hour.” A mild irritation plucked at his high, whiney voice as his eyes skated over the broken blinds.

  “Stop calling me that,” she said firmly. “That’s not my name.”

  He smiled through thin lips, and some reflex in Isaac felt an urge to punch him. There was something very irksome about this guy, some kind of underlying aura of arrogance despite his scrawny, slumped façade. The image of a weasel with an attitude problem kept popping into Isaac’s head; he wanted to wipe the smirk right off his ugly little face.

  “Very well then, Elizabeth. I see your memory is finally returning.”